10/5/07

Trips

Well it has been a while since I posted. Mainly, because work is stressing me out. So, when I come home the last thing I want to do is turn on the computer. Even for fun stuff like blogging and ebaying!

Here is my problem. I have to go somewhere for a work function over night. I don’t want to go. We are staying in a very upscale resort and spa-somewhere that I would NEVER get to go left to my own devices. The problem is I am completely freaked out to leave the dogs. Now, the dogs will be fine. My dad is taking care of them and he is great with them. Plus my parents live 1.1 miles away, so multiple trips to my house to let them out really won’t be too much of a hardship. The problem is me. I am having huge separation anxiety. You see, I have never left them overnight in the past 5 years. This is significant. It became worse once I was divorced. The dogs became my “security blanket”. I knew when I got home they would be there waiting for me. And I kind of became a homebody. I mean I am not a hermit. I still go to the store, go my parents, go to my brother and sister-in-laws. I mean I have no problem going out for a couple of hours. But I want to be home, sleep in my own bed with the dogs snoring around me. I guess it is like people who can only go to sleep with the T.V. on or some other “white” noise. The dogs are my “white” noise!

Second, I am pretty shy and just the thought of having to possibly “mingle” with the 500 people that will be there has the potential to send me into an anxiety attack right now! I don’t think that I have anything that these people would be interested in hearing. Maybe we will run out of steak and chicken dinners and I will be allowed to go to my room and order room service! That would be great! But not likely.

Oh well, I will just need to suck it up and try to enjoy my time at an exclusive hotel and spa in the mountains in October!

Wish me luck. Seriously.

2 comments:

Char said...

An exclusive hotel and spa in the mountains in October sounds pretty darn inviting!
All you can do is try to enjoy it. Know that your dogs will be taken care of and they'll be there waiting for you and happy to see you when you return I'm sure.
I know what you mean about white noise, I have to have a fan going to be able to sleep.

Catz said...

I very well know what you are talking about. I have PTSD and at one point in my life it caused me to have very severe agoraphobia (fear of open spaces) I rarely left my home and my cats. I would literally feel sick to my stomach at the thought. However once I started doing it I began to get better and better at it. I hate to leave my dog for the very same reasons and even though now a lot of my job requires me to make conversation with people at events I always feel like you do inside What on earth will I talk to them about?
My advice - fake it till you make it! Literally! Just ask them questions about themselves because everyone but you and me likes to talk about themselves :)
BTW thanks for visiting my blog and you sound like me kinda gal - Hiking with wolves is something I now dream of every night. Can you send me the website of the one you were talking about?